THINK Before You Speak (Gossip)

The Tuesday blog is currently dedicated to a series of posts on taming the tongue. We have been encouraged to put the principle of THINK before you speak into action and allowing God's Spirit to be our filter as our thoughts turn into words. Last week, we examined our speech as it relates to how we speak to and about our spouses. This week is the mother of all issues I believe we face, and that is gossip.

I believe people see many areas as grey areas when it comes to gossip. For example, in some family circles, everybody knows what is going on in everybody else's lives and do not consider this gossip. Aunts, cousins, siblings all know intimate details of every family member's life and such is often the topic of conversation at family get-togethers. What is your view on this? What boundaries have you established in your family?

Another grey area is where to draw the line when it comes to informing vs. gossip. Nobody wants to go up to a friend who is going through a divorce and ask how their spouse is doing or say a friendly, "Happy Anniversary". So, is it okay at some points to share basic info as long as you don't go into too much detail? And how much is too much when it comes to the details?

I am sure we have all heard the conversation (gossip) starter, "So and so needs prayer...". Is it okay to share information when asking for prayer? If God knows the details of a situation, do we need to in order to better pray for someone?

Here are some more questions to ponder as well as some Bible verses to see what God has to say about gossip.

Where do you find yourself most tempted to gossip (on a phone call with a friend, on the playground, at work, etc.)?
If it's family, is it still gossip?
How can you resist that urge to "just have to tell somebody"?
Is there a current situation you need to make right in this area?

He who goes about as a talebearer reveals secrets, But he who is trustworthy conceals a matter.

Proverbs 11:13 

A perverse man spreads strife, And a slanderer separates intimate friends.

Proverbs 16:28 

And at the same time they also learn to be idle, as they go around from house to house; and not merely idle, but also gossips and busybodies, talking about things not proper to mention.

1 Timothy 5:13 

Likewise, the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole body, sets the whole course of one’s life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell. All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and sea creatures are being tamed and have been tamed by mankind, but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.

With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not be.

James 3:5-10 

Father,

Please help me to control my thoughts and words that whatever comes out of my mouth is pleasing to You. Today, I ask for help to avoid the temptation to gossip and listen to gossip. Please help me find things to talk about that are true, helpful, inspiring, necessary, and kind. When I stumble, please let it be a lesson as I feel the conviction in my heart, and may I apologize and ask for help from my friends to hold me accountable in this area. May no pain be caused or fire set ablaze due to my tongue. Please give me a quiet spirit and self-control to only share with You when I  just have to tell someone. May my words bring healing rather than hurt, and may I be a role model for my children in this area. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.