Fight or Flight

The fight-or-flight response, also known as the acute stress response, refers to a physiological reaction that occurs in the presence of something that is terrifying, either mentally or physically. The response is triggered by the release of hormones that prepare your body to either stay and deal with a threat or to run away to safety. (Verywellmind.com)

                        

My natural reaction in situations that are uncomfortable is to leave, take flight and run far far away. But the Spirit of Jesus in me, presses that it is neither healthy nor fruitful. God is re-teaching me this lesson, again. As I parent, there will inevitably be situations where my children struggle with other children. They are little sinners doing life with other little sinners. My initial instinct is to just lesson the time we hang out with that child/family for a season and run away, but my heart knows this habit needs to be tweaked.

When struggles arise with other kiddos we need to train our children to seek restoration God's way as in Matthew 18. Going as the one offended or the one who has offended and search out the other person to share your heart with. It's good to start in prayer and bring Jesus into the center of the struggle. God's encouraging me to go back to this basic and foster healthy communication. Sometimes in the sharing we realize it was just a misunderstanding with feelings hurt.    

I am training my kids. All day. Everyday. I am showing my children the way to live life, and the steps to enjoy healthy relationships. As I write, I notice how much I fail in this, and feel Jesus nudging me to re-evaluate how I do friendship. Its easy to run and hide. Its easy to let friendships fade away because they rub you or your children the wrong way. But the truth tells of that refining process under the surface going on between you, your kids, and Jesus. And remember we have a real ememy, named Satan, who hates unity, friendship and family. Satan wants things kept in the dark, but God wants us to reveal our hurts out in the light.


               

Friendship is hard and takes work, but if we strive to honor the Lord in them they will bring Him great glory. Don't run when it gets tough. Seek His face and look for ways of restoration. Our friendships grounded in truth will last longer and should look different than those in the world. How we handle relationships does trickle down into how our kids do too! 

Is there a friendship that you or your child need to pay more attention to? Share your heart with someone who needs to hear it today. 

Delighting in the Details

There is power in our words. Each day thousands of words flow from our lips in many directions to many people. They have the opportunity to give life or death. Lately the Lord has been highlighting the condition of my heart and how it reflects in the words I speak aloud. I can speak heavily into the struggles and forget to praise the strengths. 

I want my kids to do well.  I hope they soar in education, grow greatly in their faith in Christ, and love others well. My dreams for my kids are grandiose. Hoping for greater because we serve a supernatural God. But if I am completely candid, my heart sometimes gets lost in the current deficit, forgetting to rejoice in the positive of the present.  Focusing on the future and neglecting to celebrate the praise-worthy things right now. 

What are my kids doing well right now? Is it their passionate zeal  for the Bible or the great grades in Math? The lonely child they embraced last week at the park? Folding their clothes and putting them away with such diligence? Praying for a friend in need?

I need to praise my children in the areas they are succeeding in. Use my mouth to uplift and remind them I DO notice those little things done well. Life is hard for our kiddos with friends, bullies, sickness, practice, learning struggles, peer pressure, and homework. 

They need to hear life spoken over them daily. Reminded that they matter and are noticed and cherished. Those little victories are important to us and God too. As we seek to hone our children in the direction of Jesus, remember God delights in the details of their life and yours too!

                        

Practice praising your child daily for one area they do well. It will change the way you look at them. And how they look at you.