My Marriage...My Gift

Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. - Psalm 51:10

So as we venture into 2012 I have decided on a ONE word resolution for myself. Yep one word. INTENTIONAL. It is easy to get so busy with life that we neglect to have a plan or goal in mind. We can get stagnant in our thinking and actions, all the while wondering how we got there. The answer is easy...it is one of two reasons....(1)because we haven't identified the goal we are after or (2) we haven't asked someone to hold us accountable to staying on the path to reach it. Or both!

Today we are going to hone in on being intentional in our marriage. Marriage is hard. Joannie shared with us a few weeks ago the greatest "gift" we can give our children is to "Love Your Spouse." This really got me thinking about my marriage and how it could be better this next year. What an easy, free gift to give my children.

So...after reading, I created a simple marriage survey and sent it out to some friends. I want my marriage to be the best it can be and what better way then gleaning lessons from others (2 Corinthians 1:1-3). My prayer is that as you read the questions and the top/most common responses, your heart and spirit would be renewed for your marriage in 2012. 

SURVEY QUESTIONS:
(1) What has been the greatest joy of being married?

Sharing life and being in love with my best friend, having our children and becoming a family


Serving the Lord together


Doing life with someone! Allowing the Lord to guide and direct our lives together.


Having someone to go through the trials and joys of life with.


Having a godly leader and best friend to share life with. There is little to no drama in our marriage, and for that I am extremely thankful and blessed.


Having someone to rely on, and trust with all my heart, with anything.


Seeing the lord grow myself and my husband in our walks with him and with each other! Also sharing our children and our love for them!


Seeing how sweet our marriage has gotten by sticking together.


Waking up next to my best friend every morning!

2) What has been the hardest thing about being married? Why?

Sharing life with my best friend :):) Bringing two separate lives together as one. Losing a child. 

Giving up complete independence, especially in finances.

Caring so much. You hurt when he hurts.

Hurt....Loving someone so much that they can hurt you more than anyone else

Being on the same page. Sometimes we get so busy that we miss each other and in turn we have a breakdown in communication.

When my husband had an affair.

Learning to love each other unconditionally. You can only do it with God's help.

Sacrificing my time and energy to take care of someone else. Not always feeling appreciated for it.

Juggling everything, and making that time for each other with kids is very hard.

Forgiveness...when you know you haven't done anything wrong..but to keep the peace you give in...It is called sacrifice

I would say submitting when u don't agree with the choices being made.

Getting over those rough patches when it seems like you are completely disconnected from each other. It takes a lot of faith, prayer and time to get through it.

Putting aside my own selfishness and pride in order to have a successful marriage. To give up myself so that I can be the partner that my husband needs.

(3)  Do you do devotions together as a couple?

YES - 22.5%

NO - 32.5%

WISH WE WERE - 45% 

(4) Do you think doing a devotion or having one night per week set aside to focus on your marriage is important?

YES -98%

NO - 2%

(5) What book or marriage message/sermon/book has greatly impacted your marriage?

Love & Respect

Weekend to Remember - Getaway

The 5 Love Languages

Love Dare

Power of a Praying Wife

(6) Do you ever think back to the passion you had during your dating days (with your spouse) and wish you could have that again?

Yes 42.5%

No  15% 

Sometimes 42.5%

(7) What is one thing we can do to keep the flame alive and burning bright in our marriage?

Keep God at the center in your relationship and take time for affection, romance and intimacy.

Never stop flirting with your man. Make him sad to leave and excited to come home.

Date nights, getaways, pray together, encourage your spouse and make it a habit to focus on all their good not their bad.

Taking the time to explore each other. Sometimes I feel like romance is another chore, and that reflects on my marriage. When we were dating we studied each other and tried to know the other person. I feel that we should do that often.

Be rested enough to have more sex.

(8) What is one goal you have for your marriage in 2012?

To live another year- ha/ha- living out God's will for our lives until He calls us home.

To keep lines of communication open and healthy. To keep a sense of humor.

Devotional time together, more meaningful family times

Continue to fellowship with other believers as a couple. Intentionally make special times for just the two of us.

To look for the ways that ONLY I can be His wife!! Others could make his meals or clean his home or talk nice to him at work, but find those areas only I can do for him!

Meet couples that live a Christ centered life that can be an inspiration.

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Want to take the marriage survey too?

www.surveymonkey.com/s/SWKGC6B  

It is anonymous which allows you the freedom to be completely honest. It will give great insight into your marriage too! 

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Can I plan a night where I sit down with pen and pad in hand (or laptop :) and jot down my intentional plan for 2012. How do I plan to implement change into my marriage to better reflect who HE is? Do I have someone to hold me accountable? If not I need to seek His face, in prayer, to direct me to a friend who will.                       

Pray that this the year you become INTENTIONAL in your marriage. Ask the Lord to create in you a clean heart and a steadfast spirit as you seek to please both Christ and your husband in 2012.