We need friends to walk with us through life. We need friends who will rejoice with us on the mountain top experiences and not leave when we walk through the valley. We yearn for friends who strengthen us with words of faith and encouragement, and yet are wise to recognize the times a hug is all that's needed. Friends are vessels Christ uses to build up our character, because when we are weak they are strong. When we fall, they help brush the dirt off our knees, smile, and remind us it is the falls which make us stronger. They share of their fallen experiences which helps the bruises of our heart heal faster.
My friend Maggie is a great example of this. We have Friday play dates and so many times I struggled pulling into the parking lot on whether or not I would get out. One of my sons is very active and at times he catches me off guard. He surprises us...sometimes a HUGE hug or kiss out of the blue and other times it's something that challenges my authority and tests my patience. This caused me such anxiety. For months I would go to play dates and have little conversation with other moms because my kids were off gallivanting where other kids WEREN'T. Even when kids gathered for snack, mine were far far away from the blanket the rest would be sitting on :) I didn't understand why my kids wouldn't play with the other kids. It was on those days I needed a gentle reminder, that the Lord strategically placed my friend Maggie at the park to refresh me. Sweet, gentle Maggie.
Maggie would come over, look me in the eyes, and ask how I was doing. Sometimes even hunting me down! She genuinely cared and always gave such tender encouragement as I cried over my struggles as a mommy. She was beneficial and helpful. She built me up. Maggie brought these verses to life for me.
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. - Ephesians 4:29
The godly give good advice to their friends; the wicked lead them astray. - Proverbs 12:26
The heartfelt counsel of a friend is as sweet as perfume and incense. - Proverbs 27:9
As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend. - Proverbs 27:17
God used her to whisper words of affirmation and love when Satan wanted to discourage. I would share my hurts and how I longed for my boys to be like the rest. Maggie would remind me, "Kate, they are just boys...exploring." She would speak truth of how different each child was. It's so easy to get lost comparing our child to another, isn't it? Her words were a glass of cold water to a dry and thirsty mommy. I am so thankful that as I fell (Ecc. 4:10) there was someone there to pick me up. I always felt better after talking to Maggie. I would drive up defeated and leave ready to go back onto the battlefield. She strengthened my courage and sent me back out there to be the best mommy I could be. What a gift...I will always treasure.
What does support look like? Sometimes it is a gentle word that is needed. Maybe helping that friend move or babysitting for free for the family who hasn't been out since having kids. It may be making a meal unexpectedly for a tired and weary mommy. Or bringing that favorite coffee drink and watching the kids for a few minutes so that mom can regroup and come back strong. It may be leaving an envelope signed "Love Jesus" with cash in it, anonymously to the one hurting financially. I have been on the receiving end of this so many times. I am so thankful to Jehovah Jireh, my perfect provider, who gives to me so that I can give to others.
All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us. - 2 Corinthians 1:3-4
Challenge:
Ask the Lord to show you how you can better strengthen and support your friends. Sit back. Watch...He will give you plenty of opportunities to be used for His glory.
Think of a time you had a friend strengthen and support you. Call and let them know how God used them to minister to your heart. Allow Him to use you to encourage another!
Next Saturday...part #3 of our friendship series ..."Friends...Stand in the Gap"
Kate, I love that you are writing all these blogs on friendship because you are such a great example of what friendship is. I appreciate that example. Thank You.
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