Monday, October 7, 2013

A Place of Refuge

“The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms.” Deuteronomy 33:27

Life moves so quickly these days. We bring our babies home from the hospital one day and it seems like they are riding a bike the next. I think kids, in general, tend to make time go by quickly. There are schedules, practices, school work, play-dates, games, recitals, and a myriad of other events. But on top of that, we live in a fast-paced, grab-n- go culture where things are accelerated by modern technology and our desire to have the ‘latest and greatest’…(outfit, shoes, phone, TV, etc.). Linda Anderson, the teacher of our Mom to Mom study, stressed that we are living in a society of overworked parents and overscheduled kids. Linda doesn’t suggest that we withdraw from all activities, yet she suggests that we intentionally balance our schedules. In this blog, I am going to share with you a few of the treasures I received from my Mom to Mom group…treasures that are too valuable not to pass on.

As Linda so wisely highlighted, too often we allow our homes to become dispatch centers: a place where we meet to decide where and when to make the next move. Our homes should be a place of refuge—a place where our children feel secure and loved, a place where we build community with our kids. She mentioned that first and foremost, our children need to learn the “fear of the Lord”—who God is, who we (and they) are, and that there is a King in our house. She emphasized that it is important for our kids to learn to obey us so that they can learn to obey God.

At the same time we should make sure that our children feel loved. There is a big difference between knowing that you are loved and feeling loved. This is one of the many ways in which we can help our children relate to the everlasting love of the Father. As Courtney mentioned in a previous blog, this would require us to intentionally act instead of react to our kids—especially when they push our limits.

Our homes need to be a place of safety for our children—a place where we keep some things out and some things in. Things we should keep out are bad media influences. This can take on many forms: too much exposure to the internet, a scary part in a “kid’s show”, an inappropriate commercial, etc. And beware, although I like Disney, all of their “G” movies are not appropriate for our younger preschool children. Linda also mentioned that some things we should keep inside our home are the confidences of our children. If your child shares something with you in love and confidence, be careful not to mention it to a friend. Our kids need to know that they can trust us, and that we don’t tell our girlfriends everything about them.

I could probably go on and on about all things I learned last week, but for the sake of time (mine and yours :)), I just want to draw your attention to a few ways in which we can build community in our homes:

• Slow down and take a deep breath…there is no reason why we should feel like we need to move at lightning speed all the time…our kids can’t keep up with that, and we can barely keep up with ourselves. Too fast is too stressful!
• Eat dinner as a family as often as possible.
• Model Jesus Christ so that your kids come to understand more about Him through your example.
• Be consistent with discipline (in love), but also show mercy and grace.
• Use technology wisely, but limit its use so your kids are not addicted to your iPhone, Kindle, iPad, TV, Xbox, etc.
• Take a family vacation. Cut off the phone as much as possible.

Last, but incredibly important: Remember that too much of a good thing is still too much (i.e. sports practices, music lessons, drama, church events, etc.). :)

Have a blessed day, my friend!


Heavenly Father, you are so good to us, and in your perfect nature, you have such incredible balance. You deal with us lovingly, yet firmly. You are careful to give us what we need and sometimes what we want, but never too much. Thank you for setting the perfect example for us. Help us model your son Jesus in our home, so that our children can learn to have a personal relationship with you. Help us navigate this thing called “motherhood” in a way that truly pleases you and brings you glory. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Verses to ponder:

“He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, ‘He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.” Psalm 91:1-2

“God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.” Psalm 46:1


  1. Hello Teresa, Thank you for sharing this post. It is right where we are at in our journey and it was encouraging to read exactly what God has been showing me concerning schedules and activities. Plus the Lord has been really showing me to perserve in teaching our preschooler obedience. He reminds me to teach obedience in a loving way over and over. For she is not mine but His! God bless you! Missi

  2. Missi, thank you so much for your feedback. I love the way God uses us moms to encourage each other. I am in the same situation with my two year old--lovingly teaching him to be obedient over and over again. We will reap a harvest of blessing if we do not give up. :) Hope you have a blessed day!