Goal in Mothering

I printed this verse and have it in a place I see often so when I read it I am ministered to as it helps me remember the goal in mothering.

 

We planted pretty flowers in our front yard and have tried not to kill them right away.  However, some of them have perished despite the rich soil they are in and my concerted efforts to provide them the necessary water each day.  My steadfast determination made me not give up!  I remember as a little girl helping my mom plant flowers, tomatoes and beans in the garden.  At the end of the season we would take the marigold pouches after they had bloomed and then “died” and plant them next year. 

So in our small garden right before shower and bedtime I gathered some seeds, enlisted the help of our four year-old daughter, Jordan and started to plant them ALL over the place.  Then watered and prayed for them.   

I think I even surprised myself when I let her help me plant the seeds.  Just as in baking, it’s hard for me to let the kids help me do things that I could do in less time and neater.  But thinking back, I love the memories I have of washing the dishes with my mom and sister, gardening, pinning the clothes on the clothesline outside, and helping make macaroni and cheese from scratch.  Pushing our kids away just so it gets done perfectly neat and in an efficient manner of time, will not reap a rich harvest and it will limit our connection and the memories they could have for a lifetime.  Don't give up Momma.

School of Temptation

Do you ever wonder why temptation doesn't just flee? Why do we have to continually choose to stand against it?

Judges 3:1&2 tells us "These are the nations (temptations) that the Lord left in the land to test those Israelites who had not experienced the wars of Canaan.  He did this to teach warfare to generations of Israelites who had no experience in battle."

As a mom, I pray all the time that my children (spouse and self too) would be "easily entreated."  You see, I don't like trials and I don't want to go through them.  I just want to hear the Lord's voice and stay on His best path for my life to bring fruit to His kingdom.

The Israelites had a pattern, called the "sin cycle" that went something like this:

1.  The generation that saw His rescuing hand worshipped Him and kept His commands.
2.  The next generation, who didn't have that first hand knowledge, started to compromise.
3.  They started intermingling and worshipping other gods.
4.  God sent His punishment, usually in the form of an oppressor, to subdue them.
5.  They cried out to the real God for help and God sent them a rescuer.
6.  That generation followed Him.  Repeat cycle.

God, in His wisdom knows our human nature.  If our lives were easy, battle free, we too would grow complacent in our determination to set ourselves apart for Him.  Likewise, when we go through trials, our children see first hand how we handle it.  They see us on our knees and in the Word. They see us seeking His face.  Then they see His deliverance! Our children are learning the art of warfare, which they will pass on to their children, and so on.

God's plan is for us to be sharp, persistent and victorious. The trials will continue in the life, until we enter in to His final rest for us, but they are purposeful and He promises (1 Cor 10:13) He will not give us more than we can handle.

Perspective of a Blue Donkey

         I really like the idea of meeting authors.  I would like to ask: how they decided on the plot; where did the idea for their characters develop; what was their purpose in their writings.  I think I would especially enjoy meeting the authors of classic children’s book.  I reflect often on the truths I’ve gleaned in books written for children.

         One such author would be A. A. Milne, notoriously known for his Winnie The Pooh stories.  His characters, Winnie the Pooh, Tigger, Piglet, Roo, Christopher Robin and Eeyore have a place in our childhood that rival our affections for the mouse family in Orlando.

         As of late, and for the first time in my life, I have felt the temptation to give into the fictional character of the often-blue donkey, Eeyore.  Eeyore sees everything with exhaustion, an expectation for disappointment and even depression.  Eeyore was often illustrated looking over his shoulder at his pinned on tail.  Even then his comments were, “Could be worse. Not sure how, but it could be.”

         This week as I drove east early in the morning there were dark clouds much like the ones illustrated with Eeyore.  I looked in my rear view window to notice one small pinhole of light coming through the darkness.  As I tried to stay focused in the direction I was driving, I kept looking at this “pinhole” of light growing ever bigger.

         I thought about what our family has been experiencing in grief over a little more than two months.  That ray of light made me think I don’t know the “why” of what has happened; yet I believe the Lord may show us that He was there.

         I can be like Eeyore and point to the “cloud” and all it’s pain or I can move forward.  As I keep looking back I can begin to see more and more that the Lord WAS there.  As He is with us now, He was with us then and He is waiting for me with every step.

         Moving forward helps me to have perspective of what is behind me.  I don’t want to be like Eeyore with my head flipped over my shoulder all the time.  However, when I do glance backward I want to recognize more light than dark.

I Corinthians 13: 12

Now we see things imperfectly, like puzzling reflections in a mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity.  All that I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God now knows me completely.  

         Though I won’t have the opportunity to meet A. A. Milne and ask him about the character development of Eeyore, I hope he too found the light and joy that can only be found in the understanding of our perfect Savior Jesus. Seeing Jesus instead of a blue donkey will help keep those dark clouds in perspective!

Overcoming Bickering

This week our four-year old has off from VPK but joins Matthew (six) and me in a special week learning about the Passion week of Christ (the week before Jesus was crucified).  One of the days we read from Luke 22:7-30 to learn more about “Holy Thursday,” the night of The Last Supper.  We read how our Savior poured out His heart to His disciples, letting them in on the great plan and what they could pass along to other generations to do in remembrance of Jesus.  But during this holy moment His disciples were…BICKERING! 

Does this resonate with real moms out there?!

There you are – in the moment – you just got done saying the last word of an awesome devotion for your kids where you thought they were SO attentive and it REALLY got through…. AND THEN… they start to BICKER!!

But here is where I focused my attention:  What was Jesus’ response?  Did He stand up, bang His hand on the table and yell in frustration at His disciples’ selfishness?! No, He didn’t.  Even with His betrayer RIGHT THERE, He simply responded in love and compassion.  He knows our frailty and tendency to think of ourselves before others.  He had the perfect story on hand for just such an occasion (see vs. 24-30).

Even though it didn’t seem like Jesus really got through to the disciples at that time, it is written in the Bible so WE can learn from His teaching.  And wouldn’t you know I got to use this illustration with our kids as they bickered over Legos not long after we read this awesome Bible story. 

The Lord is good and gracious. 

Thank You, my God for supplying me with what I needed at just the right time.

Mommas, read your Bible out-loud to your kids and ask them questions.  Apply it in their lives so they can relate to the story.  Maybe make hand-puppets out of socks or paper bags and put on a play.  Also, have these stories in your “back pocket” to use in everyday teaching moments.

REAL ALERT!

SO...we have been waiting on God for a specific issue for what seems like decades.  Recently, my flesh has been wanting out.  "I didn't ask for it," I don't wanna do it," "Are you really going to do it?" "I know You can do it, but WILL You do it?" all race through my brain daily.

In my sane moments, I know this issue we wait on is for His glory, I know its for the furtherance of His kingdom, and I know there is no reason why He wouldn't answer.

He has given us encouraging scripture along the way, and yet my flesh wants this trial over!

Today, I woke up with my busy thoughts, determined to keep moving forward (moving helps me to not over think) and I saw through the crack in the bathroom door, my hair tousled husband,  roll out of bed and to his knees in seeking God.   I was overwhelmed with humility and gratefulness all at the same time.  This is why I married this man.  He reminds me to keep going to the foot of the cross where all is made right.  God loves humility and He wants us to depend on Him for everything.  He tells us to keep seeking with persistent-widow like tenacity.

So, here I go, back to the powerful, hopeful, healing, foot of the cross! Thank You, Jesus, for Your grace and mercy!

"Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you." 1 Thess 5:16-18

From Generation to Generation (Written by my Mom, Bernice Blewitt)

My Mom, Dora Henriksen died last Thursday, February 18,2016.   She was 94.  We had a memorial service at our church this past Sunday.   As I was preparing what to say in her honor, I realized how much my Mom has shaped my life.

I don’t ever remember my mother giving me any advice – you know, the sit down and let’s talk – about how to get along in this world.    And yet, she taught me everything.

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.”   Galatians 5:22, 23

My mother taught me, not by words, but by how she lived.  She lived the fruit of the Spirit.  And how she lived her life would forever direct my life.  I watched her love people – she took in anyone who needed a place to live for a while (and there were quite a few of them), I watched as she comforted those who were mourning, as she was a friend to the house-bound, as she provided for more people than I could count.  My Mom made sure we knew about Jesus and showed us how important it was to live accordingly.

She taught me how to be a wife to by husband: respect, obedience, and yes, submission.  My husband, when we were dating, told me part of his attraction to me was my parents – that he wanted what they had.

I am a grandma now, but my Mom showed me the responsibility never ends to be the example to our children (and grandchildren) that leads to a life well lived. 

“My little children, let us not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth.   And by this we know that we are of the truth, and shall assure our hearts before Him.”   I John 3:18, 19

The Due Date

As moms we always look forward to “the due date.”  At the first moment’s of reality that… “I might be pregnant?”  We ask the question, “When will that mean I’m due?”  During my pregnancy I ran to the “pregnancy wheel” and looked at the calculations for the approximate time of arrival.

         Today, I’m sure there is an “App for that!”

         However you find out…it is much anticipated.  You know it will come.  You know there will be much to do as you wait.  So in the vastness that separates saltines and ginger ale to the choosing doctors, having baby showers and decorating the beloved space where our children will sleep their first night home, we wait.

         I am grateful for our three that came on or before their due date.

         Our first grandchild’s due date is Sunday, February 14, 2016.  But she came early.  Kennedy Drew was born January 20.  She never took her first breath.

         Our hearts are tormented. Ripped beyond words. 

         The due date waits.

         The loss that surrounded January 20 is only more pronounced as we watch the due date arrive.  How can we face this date without the anticipation of our Kennedy? Please, putting me aside, how do my precious son and daughter in law look square the face of the calendar on Sunday?

         I told our son and daughter in law because there are not directions on how to parent each child in each season; I am unprepared to “parent” them in this season of grief.  I am to parent our mourning children while I mourn.

         My solutions and expertise are shattered. Except for God’s Word. His healing balm.

         Today I'm reminded there is a “wait.”

Habakkuk 2:3

“For the vision is yet for the appointed time;

it testifies about the end and will not lie.

Though it delays,

WAIT FOR IT,

Since it will certainly come and not be late.”

         We are all waiting.  Now, not for Kennedy’s due date, but ours and our Lord Jesus Christ’s.  Our home-going, His return.

         We don’t wait as those without hope!  We wait in excitement and anticipation of the confetti He has cued.

         He is ready.  He is ready for our wait. He is not just at the end of wait.  He is with us in our wait.  I believe He is holding our hands and comforting us.  I believe He is waiting.   He is cupping our chins and lifting our heads and directing our focus to what is at the end of our wait.

He is worth the wait.

I wait with expectation.

I wait not only with the Author of the Wait 

but the Author of the Due Date.

For our Parakaleo friends, please pray for our family as we walk through this time of great mourning.  Remember to pray for others who are carrying difficult circumstances.  You don’t need to be reminded how tough this “mom” thing is.  God’s Word, prayer and His people are our life rafts during these dark hours.  We need each other.  Thank you in advance for your much needed prayers.