The Waiting Game

Hi, I'm Tracey. I grew up in Michigan, but have spent the past 12 years in Colorado where I met and married my husband. We now reside in Parkland where we raise our two little boys, Cooper (4) and Griffin (3), who continue to fill our lives with joy. I taught middle school for eight years before having our first son and after that decided to stay home to raise our family. I often think that teaching a classroom full of middle schoolers was more manageable than training two toddlers. But I wouldn't trade it for the world. God has richly blessed our lives and we are ever so grateful to Him for the opportunity to be parents and to love on this next generation of kids.


"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." -Proverbs 3:5-6


About a year ago, my husband and I were sitting in a crowded restaurant teary-eyed and with very few words. We were tired. We were anxious and we were in need of an answer. At that time, we had been living with my husband's parents for about a year and raising (then) a two and three year old (both in the male version). Now, I love my boys to pieces. I love their endless amounts of energy. I love their spirit of adventure even if my house has seen every insect known to man. I love how they laugh out loud and how when I tell them they can lick the bowl they literally stick their head into the bowl and lick it. These things I love. But when living with grandma and grandpa...two people who have been out of this season for a very long time...let's face it--there will be times when the energy of two little ones in someone else's home will wear you down so thin you'd do anything to have your own space. So, this is how it was. We were worn.


My husband and I had just finished renovating our house a year earlier and decided to put it on the market to see if anyone would buy it. To our surprise, it sold within a couple of days. At that time, we were very excited. One of our goals at the beginning of our marriage was to buy, renovate and sell homes within a few years of living in them. And this was year three on Hickory Hill. The next logical step in "our" plan was to move in with Rob's parents for a couple of months while searching for our next project home. But during that time, our income was impacted by the economy like so many other self-employed families and our prayers went from, "Lead us to our next home, Lord," to "Where will home be?". We found ourselves re-evaluating everything. Would I have to go back to work? Would I be able to find a job if that were the case? Would we have to move? If so, how far? What would Rob do? We visited these questions daily it seemed, but the more we tried to figure it out, the more frustrated we became. The precious time that we had without kids became filled with anxiety and the pressure that built week after week would end in arguments and misunderstandings. We trusted with all our hearts that God had everything in control, but we were not sensing a direction from Him. Where was He? Why was He being so silent? Were WE doing something wrong? How long would we have to wait?


I share this story, because I know as a wife, a mom, a daughter, a woman we sometimes feel the pressure for things to happen in our own time. We have desires for things to take place at specific times and if they don't--dissapointment sets in. I know this firsthand, because I've experienced it many times. It is simply a hard thing to wait and allow God to do things in His timing.


I also write this because I sit here on my couch after being in our new home for almost a year and I know that God is faithful. He ALWAYS provides. And I know that His timing is much better than our own. It is perfect. He had us right where we needed to be and he knew this time that felt so out of our control was His chance to open our hearts to what He had planned.


Whatever your story is, if you've ever been in a place of waiting then we have something in common. And I encourage you to take this journey with us. I have never blogged in my life, but almost a year later I am praising God for the many blessings He has showered on us since that night we went to dinner. One of them is the opportunity to share this journey with you. Praise God.


What are you waiting for today? Is your heart aching for something to change? Are you in a spot where you just want things to happen faster? In your own time?


Let me share with you a passage from Streams in the Desert by L.B. Cowman written so beautifully.


It says this:


"Apparent adversity will ultimately become an advantage for those of us doing what is right, if we are willing to keep serving and to wait patiently. Think of the great victorious souls of the past who worked with steadfast faith and who were invincible and courageous! There are many blessings we will never obtain if we are unwilling to accept and endure suffering. There are certain joys that can come to us only through sorrow. There are revelations of God's divine truth that we will receive only when the lights of earth have been extinguished. And there are harvests that will grow only once the plow has done its work."


It's no surprise that this came from the October 4th entry in Streams...it just emphasizes again how perfect His timing is.


Heavenly Father, Help us to wait with patience. And in waiting give us the courage to open our hearts to You and listen.