"I'm the Leader!...But What is Leadership?"

The action: “After that, he [Jesus] poured water into a basin and he began to wash his disciples’ feet, drying them with the towel that was wrapped around him.” John 13:5

The commission:  “When he had finished washing their feet, he put on his clothes and returned to his place. "Do you understand what I have done for you?" he asked them. 13 "You call me 'Teacher' and 'Lord,' and rightly so, for that is what I am. 14 Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another's feet. 15 I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you. 16 I tell you the truth, no servant is greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him. 17 Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them.” John 13:12-17

“I’m the leader!” How often have you heard your kids battle with their friends for this coveted position? If you ask me, the dispute can get pretty heated. Kids end up with hurt feelings and claim that “they don’t want to play anymore”. With everyone (including me) encouraging their kids to “be a leader” these days, I wonder if our kids truly know what that means?

If we look to the example laid out in Scripture, to lead means to serve and give of one’s self selflessly. It’s the very essence of being a mom. We serve our kids in so many ways each day. We cook for them, clean up after them, shuttle them to practices and games, arrange play dates for them, teach them, wipe their tushies (for the little ones), cook some more, clean some more, the list goes on…

We are serving them because we love them, yet we are also their leader. We are teaching them and instructing them in righteousness…all while serving and looking out for their needs. This is the heart of leadership.  Service.

Leadership, oddly enough, also requires submission—submission to the will of the Father. Jesus modeled this perfectly. We are called to follow the example he set. Contrary to the popular saying, we are not the masters of our own fate. True peace only comes from following the Prince of Peace, not from demanding our own way.

So, fellow momma. J Next time you hear your kids arguing about who is “going to be the leader”, take it as a wonderful, God-sent opportunity to talk about the Biblical meaning of leadership.  Let their minds and hearts chew on a new meaning of leadership: service of our fellow man [or woman] and submission to our Heavenly Father.

Let’s pray.

Heavenly Father,

We are so thankful for the wisdom that comes from you. Many times your wisdom runs contrary to the “wisdom” of this world. When the world calls for pride, you call for humility. Thank you for showing us that to lead means to serve. Help us model this truth to our children and instruct them in your ways. In Jesus’ name we pray, Amen.

 Have a God-filled day! Tune in next Monday for “I’m the Leader Part 2: Making Service Practical for Little Ones”. J

The Father's Way

“For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Mark 10:45 (NIV)

It was a normal, ordinary day at track practice. I was in college going over a new hurdle workout with my coach when the most unexpected thing happened…I slammed into a hurdle, flipped upside down in the air, caught myself on the way down with my left hand, and broke my left wrist. I was shocked. I was hurt. I had surgery and went through extensive physical therapy. In fact, I still have a titanium screw in my wrist and little scar as a reminder.

BUT the thing I remember the most is that God taught me two very important lessons:

1. The power of service in the life of a believer
2. How to ask for help

I will never forget how one of my friends (not even one I would have considerrd a “best friend”), stepped up and served me during that time. She was incredibly strong in her walk with the Lord, she was fun, and she was busy. She volunteered a lot with Athletes in Action/Fellowship of Christian Athletes and she was on our college soccer team. Yet, after I had surgery, she drove out of her way to pick me up and take me to class and take me back home. She even stayed at my house a few times and helped me with little things like putting my hair up in a pony tail. Looking back she acted like so much more than a great friend; she showed me the love of Christ. She showed me faith in action.

The second concept, asking for help, was also a novel idea to me. I had always been pretty self-sufficient and independent (or so I thought), but God was teaching me that I needed the body of believers. I could not do everything on my own, and I needed to ask for help. We are blessed and allow others to be a blessing when we simply learn to ask for and accept help. There are no extra points for doing everything on your own. In fact, God’s word makes it very clear that we can do nothing apart from Him (John 15:5). Through this injury, God was teaching me to that I was not a self-made girl. Everything good that I had done was with his help and the help of others…whether I had realized that before or not.

So, in what ways can you put action to your faith and serve those in your sphere of influence? In what area of your life can you experience the beauty of the body of faith by asking for help?

Heavenly Father,
Everything begins and ends with you. You are our light-bearer. You are our rock. You are the source of our salvation. You are the Creator of the entire world, yet you served us. You sent your son, Jesus, to model you for us, and he served. He even washed the dirty, sandy-laden feet of his disciples. Please help us to follow in your ways and to serve others in a way that truly pleases you. And God in those times when we are worn out, please help us to humble ourselves and ask for help so that we can be blessed by the body of believers. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Deeper still

As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend. Pr.27:17 (NLT)

I just got back from visiting Courtney and her four children. It just so happened that both of our husbands were out of town over the weekend so I jumped in the car and drove the two and a half hours that separate us. My boys and I were very excited for some sweet fellowship. Somehow I knew it was the Lord providing an opportunity, knowing my friend has sometimes really long weeks with her husband out of town a lot. I prayed we would be a blessing to her while there. Little did I know how blessed we would be.

It’s one thing to meet up with a friend for coffee or at the park. It’s a whole other matter to go into one’s home and see how they do life for two days. My friend and I talked while fixing lunches, dinners and long after the kids went to bed. We encouraged each other in God, shared experiences, vented to each other and prayed together. Our friendship is still fairly new so we talked about our families and how we grew up. I can’t remember the last time I had an entire day with a friend without having to leave because of chores or responsibilities. After awhile everyone relaxes fully and you begin to see someone for who they are. And when you discover and observe something good, your trust grows and you begin to really receive each other. As I observed good things in my friend and her family, it happened to me, I began to learn and grow.

I saw great camaraderie between the four home schooled children. The oldest girl is an amazing young woman with a sweet smile, innocence, respect and sense of responsibility as I watched her help her mom and me with anything needed. The boys exhibited character in how they nurtured and took care of their little guest friends (even when my little guy was cranky and whiny) When they were playing the Wii, my Tyler (3yrs old) had a remote without batteries so he wouldn't get frustrated when his car went off the track. All of them told him time and again what a good driver he was even though someone else was controlling the car. (such a picture of Gods love that covers!) Another time I noticed my friends youngest one was not “babied” and took her discipline without complaining, something I was convicted about with my little guy.

The things I didn’t notice were just as significant. I didn’t notice any complaining, impatience or fights between the four. That’s amazing since we were there for two days! Nobody was telling on anyone else or being mean. There were hurt feelings when someone was excluded but it was unintentional and quickly worked out. There was a maturity and self sufficiency about the 5, 6, 8 and 10 year olds that is to be desired, but here is the real message and point that I want to make. In spending time with these four, I noticed my own children behaving better, helping more readily, obeying quicker and being more content. They conformed into their environment and were affected by their friends. Even at that age, those little ones were sharpening each other and transforming lives. How powerful!

I was edified as well, being convicted how often I offer assistance to my two boys when it’s not really needed. With four, one can’t do that and has to rely on them to express their needs. The result is a child (or four), not catered to but responsible to an extent for their own well being.
This experience was so powerful to me and I began to realize what God was intending the church to be all along, examples in real life, one to another. Not when we are on our best behavior in church but at home with our family. Would we dare to invite our friends to see how we really are? And if we fall short, would our friends dare to “sharpen” us by telling us the truth?

” Now I myself am confident concerning you, my brethren, that you also are full of goodness, filled with all knowledge, able also to admonish one another.” Rom.15:14
” And we urge you, brethren, to recognize those who labor among you, and are over you in the Lord and admonish you,” 1Thess.5:12

We all know and read the Word on how to be and grow but this permission of a friend to speak truth into our lives is undiscovered country, at least to me. What would happen if I got so deep that I could trust a friend to tell me the truth about myself? Also, in love, tell me what my blind spots are and to help me improve. How much could I grow if I allowed this admonition through my spouse or close family member who really knows me? (I have to put a disclaimer here and say that I’m of course talking about a person of integrity and a believer) I know You have people like that in your life, not perfect but redeemed and who are for you and want your best. Spend time with someone on a deeper level this week and ask sometimes for truth about yourself, as she sees it. If you can receive it, it will be life to you. I will do the same.

“Wounds from a sincere friend are better than many kisses from an enemy.” Pr.27:6 (NLT)

True friends are a gift, lets receive them and let us be one.