Stand Up for Me

It was a typical day on the soccer field. My oldest Doodlebug was practicing for the game and running a few drills with his new teammates. It was the first day of the new season for winter soccer. My son and the other kids seemed to be getting along just fine until one kid yelled, “You are a loser!” He was speaking to my son! My son looked shocked and hurt. He had just met this kid. Why was he speaking to him like that?!

Oh no…the Momma Bear was about to come out. My son was no loser! In fact, he is actually quite gifted at soccer and later scored the first two goals of the game that day. Anyways, none of that seemed to matter to this kid. He was aiming some pretty harsh words at my son for no apparent reason. The other kids in the line looked shocked too, and of course, the coach was clueless about what was happening.

No sooner than I could march across the practice field, another kid yelled, “Hey! Don’t you talk to him like that! He is MY friend!” This kid, whom I just adore, was one of my son’s friends from our homeschool group, and this was his first time playing soccer…and his first time with this league. He is not big for his age, nor did he know the other kids on the team, BUT without hesitation, he took up for my son. The other kid stammered some excuse about not talking to my son, but to the kid next to him. Well, that kid wasn’t having it, and quickly told the offending boy that he better not talk to him like that either.

I sat back on the sidelines, relieved and proud of the little boy who spoke up for my son when he really needed an advocate. Moms, we need to teach our kids how to stand in the gap for their peers. Bullying is all too common on the playground, in school, etc. Furthermore, we need to stand in the gap for other moms. All too many times, we stand around and listen to (or engage in) an inappropriate conversation. You know what I mean…the conversation where we talk about “that Mom…because we can’t believe she would…”. We need to encourage each other with our words and teach our kids to do the same. More than that, we need to lead by example and be bold for Christ by standing up and speaking up for what we know is right.

Challenge: Pray about how you can teach your child about the dangers of bullying and the importance of standing up or speaking up on behalf of someone else. Sometimes words can diffuse a situation quickly and easily. Other times they may need to seek out an adult. But let’s teach them to do something…not to idly watch, ignore, or join in the problem.

Challenge 2: As we celebrate this day in remembrance of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., tell your kids about how he stood up and spoke up for what he knew was right.

Heavenly Father,

Thank you so much for standing in the gap for us by sending your son Jesus. Help us be more like you. Help us to be the kind of women who defend and encourage with words and actions that are true and right and loving. Help us to lead by example and to teach our kids how to stand up for each other, and to ultimately stand up for their faith in you. We love you, Lord.

In Jesus’ name.

“Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but to the interests of others.” Philippians 2:4 (NIV)

“A friend loves at all times. He is there to help when trouble comes.” Proverbs 17:17 (NIrV)

THE RACE – Are We Crippling or Equipping?

Welcome Back, my precious sister-in-law, Jill!

Isaiah 43:2 “WHEN you go through deep waters, I will be with you. WHEN you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown. WHEN you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned…” 

    As we watch the fun of the Olympics, it’s neat to relate all of that hard work to the faith and trust required for a healthy Christian walk…or race!  For example, Michael Phelps’ coach Bowman states, “I’ve always tried to find ways to give him (Phelps) adversity in either meets or practice, and have him overcome it.”  What a great concept for physical training in preparing for the unexpected challenges that occur in a race!  It’s a lot like how our “Creator/Trainer” strengthens our HEARTS for the unexpected by teaching us to overcome adversity and to grow in faith.  We all know He walks with us through our fiery trials, yet He does not extinguish them for us, because He refines us and equips us through those fires! 

     What if we all used that same kind of concept on our kids – and let them learn how to “overcome adversity?”  Why not offer them that same privilege, to be refined through their fiery trials and walk with them, yet not extinguishing their fires for them?  We could better prepare them to become responsible, mature adults, instead of leading them to believe that life will revolve around them and they will always be rescued from their mistakes and choices. Do we ever want to hinder opportunities for growth in their lives?  

     Some of us, as parents, may give in to our kids’ whims and desires a little too frequently (when they don’t hear the word NO often enough), some of us may try to soften the blow or rescue them from the consequences of their bad choices (and they don’t get to learn the importance of making good ones), some of us may not even give consequences (ouch), and well, you get the picture.  Sadly, we do all of this with “good intentions” and all in the name of LOVE!?  But if we continue to show our LOVE to them in this stunting way, we end up crippling them instead of equipping them!  We might even LOVE them right into a cycle of continuous failures and a dependency on us that could last for the rest of their lives!  We can’t let it be our job to be their “Savior” - that position is already taken J  I fully understand we are ALL still learning as parents, but let’s learn from God’s example to us, and also learn from each other as parents, and make the learning process a little less painful, not only on us, but also on our world!  A quote that has stuck in my mind since I heard it is, “Instead of trying to make the world a better place for our KIDS, let’s try and make our kids better for this WORLD – and say NO to them every once in a while!”