In Route

Tonight. 

Well, I have completed the first leg of our travels. 

I’m in route. 

Actually, it’s a route that started three years ago (OK maybe 21 years ago.) 

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      Whenever it started…it continues.  This particular venture started when this blog began.  Our son began college three years ago and tomorrow…he graduates!

      My baby.  My big mushy, cuddly little guy will walk across a stage and get a diploma.

      The route began when we left him on campus.  I remember bawling as we left him to begin his college career.  Uncontrollably.  I mourned. I was inconsolable.  I didn’t want to leave my baby 771 miles and three states from our home.

       Tomorrow the route will include more than a degree.  He has learned to live with a lot of different people.  He has learned to study late into the night and to write papers that look more like chapters in a book.  He learned how to cook and wash clothes and how to manage money and time.  He has found godly friends and learned how to balance a social life while having a role as a resident assistant and holding down a part time job.

      I’m proud of our little guy.  He has done a great job in college.  He will do a great job in life.

      I’m not sure if I’ll cry on Saturday. But I know I’ll be proud of him.  Three years ago I didn’t know where this route was going to lead us.   God has certainly done far more than I ever imagined or thought.   

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     We haven't always recognized His route but we are grateful for His uncompromising love and presence. I don't know where the next route will lead in our parenting.  I don't know if it will be easy and smooth or difficult.  What I do know is I want the Lord's plans, I want His best and I want to follow Him as I remain in the role as the mother of our three children!  Proverbs 16: 4 "The Lord has made everything for His own purposes." Proverbs 16: 1  "We can make our plans, but the final outcome is in God's hands."

People Watching

Proverbs 24: 3, 4

“By wisdom a house is built,

and through understanding it is established;

through knowledge its rooms are filled

with rare and beautiful treasures.”

I’m thinking this post would be better as a confessional.  I haven’t mentioned what our “little” family project is this summer right?  We are  completely remodeling the home we just bought.  I mean a complete redo.  Holding back nothing.  We have put in all new electricity, plumbing, and an air system. We have redone the ceilings, taken out walls, and rebuilt walls. We are putting in windows, floors and cabinets.

As exciting, romantic and maybe even inspiring as you may THINK this sounds, it’s hard work!!  There has been a lot of stress.

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And the confessional part…here it is, as much as we have wanted to act like Christ, we haven’t acted liked Christ every step of the way.  We have prayed and tried to reflect Him, but we are so trapped in this humanness.

We have found ourselves having to ask forgiveness for being unkind and short tempered.  We have misunderstood and not listened to each other.  Personally, I’ve felt like a failure as I have given in to the demands of the moment.  

Each night as a family we fall in to bed utterly exhausted not thinking we will make it another day.  As we drift to sleep we thank the Lord for the amazing gift of our new home and beg forgiveness for falling short, asking for His strength and patience to make it through the next day as we try to rebuild a home from the inside out.

One of the contract workers pulled my husband aside this week to tell him his impression of our family.  His observations were of a family working together.  Honoring one another, working hard, and loving each other.  We were so appreciative of the Lord’s faithfulness to cover our failures and sinfulness. 

This observation is not to give us a license to live in sin. Rather, this is a reminder that people are always watching us.  We are not living behind closed doors.  People are constantly taking notice of our behavior, both the good and the bad.

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We aren’t finished with our home renovations nor is the finish line in sight. Neither is the Lord finished with me!!  He is patiently loving me.  Patiently wanting me to submit my will to His.  He actually never misses a thing I say or do.  He never stops watching over me.  He never stops watching out for me.  I am grateful our Heavenly Father is a "People Watcher!"